The Walking Dead recap "Try"

**This review is based off of the televised episodes (not the comic book storyline) of The Walking Dead, covering events that have already aired. May contain spoilers for those who are not caught up.**

I won't lie. Season 5 of The Walking Dead will, for me, go down as the most emotionally taxing. Honestly I was numb going into last night's episode. After everything we've been through, from the Termites, to Father Gabriel, to gaining and losing great characters like Noah, (#inmourning #ineedahug) and losing old favorites like Bob, Beth and Tyreese, I have to admit that I'm more apprehensive than normal when Sunday rolls around. Anything can happen, and things have been setting up like a powder keg every episode since they arrived at the Alexandria Safe Zone.

With only one episode to go before the 90-minute finale, we knew that a couple of issues had to come up and - honestly - several people have got to go. "Try" addresses a couple of these issues, in a very odd, disjointed WTF manner that left my whole family wondering what the hell we had just watched.

It started with an odd memorial for Aiden, Deanna's son, who bit the big one on the last episode.

(That shallow pool listened to NIN, really?)

Deanna is understandably distraught that her son didn't return from a run. But is she necessarily surprised? If I have one complaint about the Alexandria storyline, it's that it's being written as too black or white. Aiden was clearly an idiot who cared more about how his dick was swinging than doing his job. After roughly two years of this kind of "more balls than brains" leadership, he'd have killed himself long before our group showed up. So the question isn't, "Did Rick's group kill Aiden?" It's more, "Why are we so surprised it took him two years to kill himself?"

Granted the Alexandrites tend to get each other in dire situations and then bail, saving their own skin first. But I'm having a little bit of trouble suspending belief that, as ignorant as they are portrayed, they haven't all just died already.

He shot a grenade, people!

("Well, Ginger... to be fair he didn't see the grenade." Maybe... but he was unloading his weapon on a walker in full riot gear, drawing more walkers with the sound. How is it that Maggie, who was raised on a freaking farm, knew to get close and use her blade, and the dude with ROTC training kept shooting? I mean... honestly. I can't even.)

More evidence of stupidity... the pressure cooker that is the Good Surgeon Pete, who shows up creepy and drunk more often than not. When Rick takes this issue to Deanna, she admits that she knows he's got a problem but he's a surgeon, dammit. And she's willing to keep someone around who is emotionally unstable for the benefit of the group as a whole. Not sure how having a drunk, emotionally unstable surgeon is better than having no surgeon at all BUT this is the current rationale of leadership in Alexandria.

If you go back several episodes where our group was on the way to Alexandria, Aaron even tells Noah (#momentofsilence #stillinmourning) that they have a "brilliant" surgeon named Pete at the compound who could help him with his limp.

So Aaron, who prides himself on being able to tell the good people from the bad people, is clueless to how bad Pete really is AND he's extolling his brilliance as a surgeon when the dude can't even stay sober in the daylight?

Really?

That Aaron is the smartest of the Alexandrites doesn't bode well for *any* of them, frankly.

And Nicholas. I can't even get into Nicholas. If I had been Glenn, there would still be traces of traitorous fuckhead's face on the cement near the warehouse where Noah died (#momentofsilence #fuckrevolvingdoors.) That's not how Glenn rolls, though, even when he had to watch the brutal death of a treasured new friend/brother. After a bit of research, I came to realize that Glenn has no human kills. You remember those three questions, I'm sure. How many walkers have you killed? How many humans have you killed? Why? Well, Glenn has not yet been forced to deal with a human in this way. Even in "Four Walls and a Roof," he and Maggie stood back in shock while Rick, Sasha, Michonne and Abraham went feral on the Termites who dared to show their faces at Father Gabriel's church. (#judas #lookattheprettyflowers) Glenn also showed a great deal of trepidation in Season Two's "Nebraska," where Rick used deadly force on a couple of sketchy strangers they happened upon in a bar, searching for Hershel.

In fact, the only human that Glenn seemed on board to execute was Season Two's Randall. It caused a rift between him and Dale right before Dale's untimely demise. Maybe he's still carrying that guilt? Maybe he just isn't that kind of guy? Either way... his insistence to save Nicholas, while noble, I fear will come back to bite him in the ass eventually.

I always have mixed feelings when I realize that Daryl will be playing a bigger part in the episode, especially since he's spending more time outside the walls of Alexandria than inside. He and Aaron are out on a scouting mission, which - like I said, doesn't bode well that Daryl is going to have to compensate for the ineptitude of one of the Alexandrites. They don't recruit anyone else, but the mystery of the "W" walkers deepens when they find a naked woman tied to a tree. In one of this episode's only real Finger Shields moment, a couple of things become clear. One, this woman was put there on purpose, likely by someone who brutalized her first. She was likely alive when it happened, and left there for Zombie Chow (bait?) in a manner eerily similar to Carol's terrifying bedtime story for Sam weeks ago. When they raise her head, they see the "W" marked in her skin, right around the time she starts to rouse as a walker.

First thought: whoever is doing this is purposefully turning people into walkers, and branding them for some unknown reason. A sadistic fuck to be sure, and our guys are right there on his or her tail. Greaaaat. Are the "wolves" that are coming a zombie army, rather than a group of people? Are zombies being "raised" to infest/overrun decent communities and then dismembered and torn apart later after the deed is done? Consider what happened to Noah's (#momentofsilence #nicholasmustdie) community, where it was burned out and raided, leaving behind dozens of dismembered zombies as some kind of sick calling card. The Governor has already set a precedence for this back in Season 3, where he busted down the gate of the prison with a van full of walkers, to infiltrate the fortress and scramble those who lived there, leaving them vulnerable for a takeover. And if this is the purpose of The Wolves, just who the heck is the sick mind leading them?

(I don't think I'm ready for the answer to this question.)

Another problem I had with last night's episode was the continuing Shane-ification of Rick Grimes. The poor guy has been through some stuff and we can all sympathize. But it seems as though the Rick who walked through the gates at Alexandria is not the same Rick we met at the beginning of Season Five. Even in Season Four's finale, where he ripped the throat out of Claimer Joe with his teeth, he experienced that WTF moment of "Who am I? What am I becoming?"

I refuse to believe that this world has turned our favorite Officer Friendly, who always led with loyalty and honor, would immediately latch on to someone like Jessie. Yes, she does represent the feminine ideal to someone like Rick. We already know he has a thing for delusional damsels in distress. And yes, we know that he has little tolerance for those who hurt others because they get something out of it. But I'm having a bit of a problem with the idea that he's willing to kill a man to get to his wife. That's way more Shane than Rick. I know that this world has taken a lot from Rick, but I should hope his inherent character isn't one of them.

This isn't a matter of survival. Not really. Rick could beat him down (and did, hallelujah,) and do the job he's there to do as constable... keep law and order in their fledgling society. No, Rick wants him gone, out of the way, finito. Carol got right to the core of it when she told Rick, "I know why YOU want him dead."

I find it just has hard to believe that Pete is just *now* getting out of control. Sure, he finds Rick a threat. But he also tried to intimidate Carol as well, and Deanna already knew that he was hurting Jessie (which means he probably wasn't doing a whole lot to hide it.) For the Alexandrites, his skill-set is worth turning a blind eye. That's empowering for a sociopath, which it is clear he's turning out to be. So why is this just *now* coming to a head after years of idyllic Virginia compound living?

Sadly for Rick, he's showing a few psychotic tendencies of his own. "KEEP WALKING." (Shudder.) This led to the brutal beat-down at the end of the episode. True, Pete did start it. ("Ah. Stupid man.") He was relentless as he pushed Rick to the edge, maybe thinking of the two men, he was the more valuable to Deanna than the brand new constable and thus, would avoid being exiled like Rick is now likely to be.

Rick promptly loses his shit and turns a gun on the Alexandrites who try to intervene with his doling out some Shane-like Georgia justice. His rant, which is largely (sadly) on point - that they are too naive and clueless to survive on their own - was cut short when Michonne clocked him from behind, fulfilling her duties as co-constable. It is also the first "betrayal" of loyalties, where she turns on Rick in order to preserve the community they now share.

This was your real WTF moment of the episode. Michonne evolved quite a bit in this episode. Earlier in the show, we saw Michonne lying on her nice new bed with crisp, fresh linens, still fully dressed, ready to go at any given moment, showing that even in this seemingly safe environment, our Michonne is still in there somewhere. But when she and Rosita go out looking for Sasha, she fails to take her Katana with her. (Both scenes are a masterclass in "show don't tell," btw. Kernels of brilliance in an otherwise unbalanced episode.) Right before the epic #GIRLPOWER scene where Sasha, Rosita and Michonne take down a horde all on their very own, we see Michonne mentally process her timeline in flashbacks, where she goes from hooded stranger dragging around "pets" to the woman she is now: a protector... a nurturer. She's going to do what needs to be done to protect those she feels called to protect, which is what happened with Sasha.

It was that nurturer who decided to knock Rick out so he wouldn't get himself, or the rest of them, ejected from this new bastion of safety/civilization.

But it does hint at a breakdown of the group. If Deanna decides to exile Rick and Rick alone, who will stand with their venerable leader, and who will stay for the illusion of safety that can be found behind the walls in Alexandria? After their time on the road, when they were without food and water and at the brink of their own survival, who of this group will forfeit running water, electricity, walls and community to follow a virtual madman? Even Carl tried to rein his father in. If given the choice to keep Judith safe and be loyal to his father, if those are two competing ideas, which will he choose?

These are the questions we're left with as we race towards Season Five's finale which, once again, threatens the sanctuary where our survivors have found themselves.

AGAIN.

Normally I'd bitch loudly about their going back on hiatus so quickly after returning to air. (Feb. 8 - March 29... really?) I'd have plenty to say about the long wait till (likely) October before we get more new episodes.

Frankly, y'all... I could use the break. This season has been a doozy. It *terrifies* me what's to come. (And we all know what's to come. His name is Negan and, if it plays out like I fear it will, will likely be the jumping off point for this particular WD fan.) I'm mired in the muck, as it were. And as we're losing all the characters who promise hope, who promise humanity, who make us care, I'm wondering what point there is to keep watching. Eventually they're all either going to die a martyr or live a villain, and much sooner rather than later at this rate. Some we barely get to know before they're gone, speeding through characters just to build up a body count.

Beth and Bob, I get. Tyreese and Noah? Missed opportunities.

The things I love about the Walking Dead have been sadly scarce this season. The pacing has been all off for me this time around. It started when, after the half-season buildup to Terminus, the issue with the Termites was virtually solved in the opening episode. Our people have been floundering from one setting to the next ever since, and then when they get somewhere they can more leisurely explore the key draw to The Walking Dead (what happens to humanity when civilization breaks down,) everything happens all at once, like a box of fireworks that detonates prematurely. I wouldn't have minded a slower burn at Alexandria, where the people weren't so flipping stupid that the destruction of their bubble is so freaking imminent. The way it is now, it feels like we're burning through key events in the comic to get us closer to the next "money" shot, relying on constant, shocking deaths of beloved members of the group to keep the buzz going.

It just doesn't feel as deliberate and well-laid out as before. This episode, which accelerated the problems with Pete while dropping entirely the issue with Father Gabriel, felt disjointed and ill-fitting. Last week's episode, though we lost Noah (#momentofsilence #nicholaslookattheflowers,) was much more of a representation of what this series has to offer in terms of emotional payoff.

Needless to say I'm scared of next Sunday's episode, ominously titled "Conquer." I may have to turn it into a drinking game somehow just to get through the damn thing.

Given that Rick has ordered that the walls be reinforced, and Sasha was picking off a growing horde of walkers right at these questionable walls, I feel about 87% sure that a breach of said walls is coming in the finale. This theory feeds into the Walkers as Wolves theory mentioned above. IF, at that point, what Alexandrites remain might actually prefer a change in leadership, trusting Rick and his group to keep them safe from the "real" world beyond their gates, which would not only stabilize the characters but facilitate some of the storylines from the comic book.

If I had to give odds on this group's survival, I think we can expect the following deaths next week:

1. Nicholas. Whether he's killed or exiled, he's gots to go. (My theory: since he's already had experience on the outside of the walls, I think he'll be exiled and end up with another community, which he'll fuel against Alexandria thanks to a hefty grudge, which will ensure drama for next season.)
2. Father Nicholas. I actually prefer they exile this wolf in sheep's clothing (ooo - it just hit me that may be the overall theme for the season, with him precipitating the Wolf invasion to come...pretty sneaky, sis.) Frankly there's no better karma for him to face the outside world on his own after he A. turned his back on his own flock and B. tried to get our group kicked out.
3. Pete. And it should be Carol. Period.
4. Jessie, because it could likely be the thing that shocks Rick back into, well, Rick. He can't be rewarded for his Shane-like behavior by getting the merry widow all to himself. (Although I do say they'll likely have some pretty animalistic sex next Sunday, and I'm OK with that. Get Rick laid. It may relieve some stress.)
5. Sam. I actually would prefer to see Sam live and Carol return to her mom roots a little bit. They have great chemistry together and it'd be nice if she had a kid that didn't up and die on her. BUT...
6. Carol's likely on the chopping block as well. It has arguably been her season, from her triumphant return to the group at the Season Five opener. Her behavior isn't unlike Rick's at this point, and there will likely be a reckoning for that. She's stoking Rick as well, which threatens to make it even more explosive. (I think, had Daryl been there, he would have tried to reason with Rick to find another way to handle Pete, like he did when they went to rescue Beth. Ever since he freed himself from his brother, his loyalty comes second to what he thinks is right.) They could use her killing Pete as a testament of how far she's come from the timid battered wife she was with the show started, and then let her go out in a blaze of glory WD style.
7. Sasha. This one seems a *little* obvious and would be a loss for the group given her skills as a sharp-shooter, but Sasha clearly has a death wish in her new Bob-less, Tyrees-less world. Since she's had the hardest time acclimating to Alexandria, and I think with or without a wall breach, our group is going to stay in Alexandria through next season, it makes the most sense that she falter.

For the record, I hope I'm wrong about both Carol and Sasha. I'd like it if we didn't lose ANYONE from our core group in the finale. I'm just not mentally prepared. But if you think about it, Season 4 was the only season finale where nobody died, Claimer Joe and his fucktard bunch of #motherdicks notwithstanding. (Season One: Jacqui. Season Two: Jimmy and Patricia. Season Three: Andrea and Milton.) With the full canvas we have now, I am 1042% certain that next week's Talking Dead "In Memoriam" section is going to be a mile freaking long. If it's the top three people mentioned above, I'm OK with it.

So that's it. One more episode to go and then we can rest. Next week I'm bringing cupcakes, teddy bears and glitter... just in case.

The Walking Dead Recap "Spend"

**This review is based off of the televised episodes (not the comic book storyline) of The Walking Dead, covering events that have already aired. May contain spoilers for those who are not caught up.**

Seriously. You should go now. Venting and heartache to follow.

Okay, guys. That... was a rough one. I feel like every episode should end with a psychiatrist saying, "Here. Show us on the doll where the Walking Dead pulled your heart out of your body this week."

"Spend" opens to Father Gabriel once again taking his place at the makeshift altar of another congregation. He's welcomed with a gift and a note from one of the Alexandrites, which seems to upset the priest. We'll get to why later, where we can all gleefully plan a demise that isn't quite so heartbreaking as the one we faced tonight.

The episode started with a "money shot" of Daryl on his new bike, which was the last feel-good moment we had in this episode.

Feast your eyes, take a moment and center yourself.

They were throwing us a bone to prepare us for the loss we were all going to face by the end of the episode. Sadly I had unwittingly been spoiled about this horrific, heartbreaking ending by hitting my Twitter tab out of sheer habit two hours before the show aired. (Damned PST.) My eyes fell on the trending topics, which included "Everbody Ate Chris", and I knew with a sinking heart that one of my favorite new characters was about to become Zombie Chow.

I kind of envy that earlier me, who had no idea how far the WD creators were willing to go to rip my still-beating heart out of my chest THIS time around.

It's been a tough season. So far we've lost four significant characters in some pretty horrific ways. The main precursor, the "Cloister Bell" if you will (extra points if you can identify THAT fandom,) is that those who are the kindest, the sweetest, the most determined to hang onto their humanity are the ones with the biggest targets on their backs. Show you care and you're DOOMED! DOOMED I tell you.

Though I already knew Noah was SOL when the episode started, I'm fairly sure I could have figured it out from the little tete a tete he shared with Reg. He's thinking long-term. (To quote Eddie Izzard, "Ah. Stupid man.")

God bless Glenn's heart... he sure tried to take charge in their little mission for supplies. And had Aiden not been a complete freaking idiot, maybe it wouldn't have gone down like it did. Suffice it to say, any team that had Eugene AND the clueless Alexandrites in it was just asking for trouble. Boy, did they find it.

The scenes through the warehouse were as Walking Dead as you get. They were tense and scary as hell. With these kinds of numbers, we knew that everyone wasn't going to make it back. Honestly, while I wasn't heartbroken to lose Aiden, I was surprised that he was taken care of this quickly into the story. But then again, he was, as I said, a freaking idiot. I'm surprised he lasted as long as he did in that world. He was our first casualty of the episode, which was also our first finger shields moment of the show.

In fact, Aiden's the reason everything went to shit at the warehouse, and I blame him entirely for losing Noah. So while his death was brutal and graphic, that was one I could watch again, thinking *you deserved it you stupid jackass.*

Rule #6 of the Walking Dead: ALWAYS LISTEN TO GLENN.

Things weren't so hairy back at Alexandria, where Rick was occupying himself with a simple case of vandalism. Sexy neighbor Jessie discovered that her owl sculpture had been destroyed in her garage, which surprised her, saying "Things like that don't happen here."

What can I say? Our gang is a bad influence. This is especially true for Sam, the kid "Scarol" tried to traumatize in our last episode. Now this kid has decided to cozy up to Carol like a cat homes in on anyone with an allergy. Carol makes it clear that she's not some warm and cozy den mother, doing her best to repel this kid before he gets too attached.

Carol has already learned that bad things happen when she gets too attached to kids.

Instead she ends up with an eager pint-sized minion. Of course it takes an eight-year-old to figure out that there are things far scarier in their town than their new residents.

Abraham is having some issues with Alexandrites too, as they head out to get materials to reinforce the walls. Walkers appear, because of course they do, and the Alexandrites are woefully unprepared to handle it. Abraham is willing to step in where everyone else is willing to check out, up to and including leaving one of their own behind to be torn apart by a horde. What they don't know is that Abraham thrives on the battle of it all. He's in his comfort zone as he swoops in as a hero soldier and single-handedly saves the girl and salvages the whole endeavor.

Because #motherdick, that's why.

This ensures yet another of our group ends up in a position of authority. Reg cautions Deanna that this kinda sounds bananas, but she relents anyway. She knows that they need these people to survive. Still... the seed of doubt has been planted, one that even Maggie cannot fully dig up.

Rick gets a little cozy little meet and greet with Pete, who is clearly under the influence and clearly erratic as a result. He tries to empathize with Rick's loss while asserting that the Alexandrites, though sheltered and clearly delusional, have experienced losses of their own.

Seeing how they interact with the outside world, that comes as no freaking surprise to any of us.

What did come as a surprise was Eugene's unselfish choice to save his injured friend Tara. Lo and behold there's a hero under that Tennessee Top Hat. The same could not be said of Nicholas, who ditches his leader, along with Glenn and Noah, to save his own sorry ass.

Last week Carol showed us that more self-serving side when she threatened Sam. The difference is that she is trying to *protect* the Alexandrites as far as she can, she just wants to protect her group should they prove to be a danger to her family. Somehow Sam seems to understand this because he keeps going back to Carol despite her being scary and off-putting. It quickly becomes clear that there's something that scares him even more. Carol, as a domestic abuse survivor, pinpoints exactly what that might be. When she goes to the house later to check on Sam, and Jesse, she faces off with Pete, who tries to intimidate Carol. Thanks to her Mary Poppins routine, he thinks he can. ("Ah. Stupid man.")

Okay, y'all. It's about that time. We need to talk about the Revolving Door scene. The creators have said that the more that they like a character, the more significant they make the death. I have to say that the Revolving Door is probably the worst of things we've seen thus far. Yes, it was claustrophobic. Yes, it was scary. Yes, it was tense as hell before anything actually happened. But once it started to happen, it was relentless. That it was a character that we liked made it drag on even longer, which prolonged our pain. First there was Dale... then there was Hershel... then Bob... then Beth... but Noah's graphic death (which you're not spared even with finger shields, BTW,) especially how it impacts poor Glenn, was heart-wrenching and soul-crushing. My son, who has never turned away from one scene on the Walking Dead, said that was one he could probably only watch once. It was that traumatic.

It wasn't just Noah that they tore apart. It wasn't just that cute kid from Everybody Hates Chris. No, Noah's death was far more symbolic. It was hope that they tore apart, ruthlessly and without apology. We know this in exquisite detail when we see that notebook that Rex gave Noah, and there's only one sentence written. "This is the beginning."

I need a moment...

Here's a chihuahua salsa dancing just to take our minds off it:



When the Governor beheaded Hershel, I declared in that moment that he needed to die before that episode was over. That's how I feel about Nicholas, who was two punches away from leaving our crew there as zombie fodder.

The same can also be said for Father Gabriel, who showed up on Deanna's doorstep to warn her about our group. This was the same group, mind you, who saved his stupid ass on more than one occasion, putting themselves at great risk to do it. Yet this ungrateful son of a bitch actually actively campaigned to have them removed from this new paradise because "they didn't deserve it."

I guess that only applies to people of the cloth who leave their entire congregation to be torn to bits and eaten alive right outside the church keeping one man safe.

#motherdick. #justsayin

Fortunately Maggie overheard this turncoat's betrayal. I think it's fairly certain that Father Gabriel's days are numbered. It just goes to show you can't open your door to anyone spouting about angels and Satan even after the zombie apocalypse.

So here's how it stands for this season to end satisfactorily:

Nicholas: #hastodie
Pete: #hastodie
Father Gabriel: #hastodieslowly #shouldhavebeenhimnotnoah

Needless to say, the safe haven of Alexandria is about to reach the breaking point. After everything we've been through already this season, I'm positively terrified to see what happens next week.

But tune in, I will.

Because #motherdick, that's why.

The Walking Dead "Forget"

**This review is based off of the televised episodes (not the comic book storyline) of The Walking Dead, covering events that have already aired. May contain spoilers for those who are not caught up.**

We started our latest episode of The Walking Dead with Sasha, who has had a bad run of luck in Season 5. She's never been the biggest optimist of the bunch, so each hit she's taken has leveled our strong heroine to the point that she's ready to snap at any point. Whether she's aiming to take out every Walker she sees, or she's willing to go out herself in a blaze of glory in suicide-by-zombie, our girl is walking a very fine line between sanity and snapping.

But what would sanity look like in this new world? That's the question that has been subtly posed by the introduction of the Alexandria Safe Zone. The people that live there are as close to normal as the viewer would expect to find, working, raising families, safe and actually happy within the confines of community. Only now, by season 5 of the zombie apocalypse, normal doesn't look so normal anymore. It looks suspicious and scary. That suspense drives these new episodes as we struggle to make sense of this new place, assessing if it's really what it seems to be (sanctuary) or yet another ticking time bomb.

Rick, Carol and Daryl congregate very quickly to make their own plan either way. Now that Rick has infiltrated local authority as the new constable, he's in a position to assert what he thinks needs to be done to protect the place. Deanna, though quick to invite Rick and his group to be a part of her community, even handing over power immediately (and naively,) still balks at something as simple as putting a guard on duty to protect the walls. Her motives are still unclear and suspect, even after we meet her husband, Reg.

I have to admit that I was surprised to meet Reg. The way she spoke of him last week led me to believe that he wasn't around anymore. Or maybe that's just what I've come to expect from this show. It's rare to see complete families, like Jessie and her brood. I think most of us suffer some weird form of post traumatic stress courtesy of this show, which regularly pulls the rug right out from under us. I don't know about y'all, but the night scenes, even behind the wall, freak me the f*ck out. I keep waiting for the terror of their world to sneak up behind them and catch them all unawares.

Needless to say I support Rick and his plan. And who better to execute that plan that sweet Den Mother Wannabee Mary "Carol" Poppins? I maintain that she's the most lethal member of their group - which she demonstrates in a terrifying way this particular episode. We'll get to that in a minute, where we gather for a much needed group hug as we talk about The Scene.

Despite all the big things that happen with our major characters this epi, to me, "Forget" belongs to Daryl Dixon. He isn't about assimilating into this new weird community. That sort of thing would have been foreign and frightening to him both before and after the the apocalypse. He escapes whenever he can, only this time he gets a very unexpected (and unwelcome) companion. Aaron catches up with Daryl outside the wall, "huntin' wabbits," but it's quickly clear that Aaron has another agenda. He wants to get closer to our Archer. They attempt to catch Buttons, a rogue horse, and this shared goal makes them a team working together to protect each other when they run across a small horde. (This hungry horde makes quick work of Buttons, which... I can't even.)

This feels so much more like The Walking Dead we've come to know than the crazy Walking Dead Dinner Party happening in Alexandria. I will say that Rick Grimes cleans up well... and apparently Jessie thinks so as well as they "share a moment," despite her being married to the community doctor, Pete. Thanks to Chris Hardwick (or C-Hard) from the Talking Dead, this #porchdick from the previous episode comes across as congenial when formal introductions are made. The relationship between Pete and Jessie is strained, though we still don't know why. Jessie seems more aware than the rest, she understands how absurd their attempts at normalcy are in this post-apocalyptic world. But she also has a pretty good argument as to why it's necessary. Unlike Lori's attempts way back on the farm, to maintain the comforts of the world before, Jessie doesn't seem burdened by this task. She has a hopefulness that appeals to Season 5 Rick - maybe a little *too* much.

It dawned on me over the last day or two that Rick is channeling Shane in some pretty interesting ways. Shane once asserted that Rick was too weak to lead, that only Shane had the balls to make the hard decisions. Rick has proven himself, since Season 1, that he is the right one to lead, but it has come at a cost. He's no longer idealistic like he once was so long ago. He's been through too much. He's lost too much. He's turned into a Rick Grimes who will take what he wants when he wants it, like that stolen kiss at the awkward dinner party.

Slightly less awkward was the dinner scene with Daryl and the Gays, who adopted our wayward Archer. They understand what it means to be the odd man out and inherently Daryl understands this. For the first time, perhaps... ever, Daryl is understood and accepted, without having to prove one damn thing. Aaron simply "knows" what kind of a man he is, and he trusts him. This touches Daryl in a way that melted my heart, even if it does put Daryl outside the gate more than he is inside.

Okay, y'all. Group hug time. I love Carol. I'm sure many of you love Carol. She'll do anything - and I do mean anything - to protect her group. And she can do it looking like the mother next door, wearing her floral sweaters and her pearls, and still manage to scare the ever-lovin' crap out of anyone in the process. Her scene with young Sam was one of the most terrifying scenes The Walking Dead has produced. Her final scenes with Lizzy were heart-wrenching enough because we knew that Mother Carol, the one who had loved and lost Sophia, had to do the one thing no woman should ever have to do. She had no choice, and Carol comes through in those situations better than most. By the time we get to Alexandria, Carol is hardened by the experience enough that she can threaten this innocent boy who found himself at the wrong place at the wrong time and we believe her. We know she doesn't want to do the things she so convincingly threatened, but she could. Which makes it even scarier. (To be absolutely honest, the only reason I got through the scene at all was because I was running that Eddie Izzard routine "Cake or Death" through my head the entire time. Desperate times call for desperate measures.)

The #Carolscookies scene was awkward and intense and physically uncomfortable because we know that she needs to ensure that Sam won't tattle to his mom. We want her to succeed in her mission. We know she has to. But how far are we, as an audience, willing to go to see that happen? This scene answered that question. It seems like we are as much the dangerous outsiders as our group.

And that's where our gang finds themselves as the episode closes. Michonne retires her trusted katana, well within reach but no longer attached firmly to her back like an extra arm. Daryl refuses to carry one of Carol's ill-gotten handguns. He's ready to try, to give the place a chance. Meanwhile Rick assesses Jessie's tense domestic situation with an automatic hand to his gun, in an almost Shane-like possessive gesture.

When the episode ends, Rick is at the wall that separates the more idyllic Alexandria, a place for his children to actually grow safe and protected and - for lack of a better word - normal, and the world he's come to know in the last few years. That world has completed who he is as a man and as a survivor, for better or worse. It is a stunning juxtaposition of the two realities... and ultimately it shows that it is Rick himself who gets to choose which will prevail.

Of course we all know that nothing idyllic can last long in this world. The previews next week promise to introduce the conflict and the drama that we've all become used to in the last five seasons. We'll get to see more of our newcomers, including Father Gabriel and the epically coiffed Eugene. In a show known for its body count, that might not be a good thing. Gird your loins as we race ever closer to the March 29th finale, which Norman Reedus promises we'll be crying/yelling at the TV by the time it's done.

Did I also mention that he's going to be on the Talking Dead season finale as well?

The good news is that we made it through this week fairly intact, with no losses to the group.

The bad news... there's still three more episodes to go.

Till next week!

The Walking Dead "Remember"

**This review is based off of the televised episodes (not the comic book storyline) of The Walking Dead, covering events that have already aired. May contain spoilers for those who are not caught up.**

Season 5 has been a rough one for our intrepid survivors. We've lost three major characters pretty close together, which has my whole family watching each new episode with great trepidation. Each of us wonders how the writers plan to rip out our hearts next. We are just as weary as Rick and his crew when they reach the Alexandria Safe-Zone, a community seemingly untouched by the horrors that exist right outside their gates.

Simple comforts like running water, electricity or clean, stocked houses are just as foreign to us as Rick's group. The juxtaposition with our feral little gang is striking. Unlike their arrival to the farm in Season Two, where everyone still had traces of what the world was like before, all of this "normal" is frightening as hell. Each of them handles it in very different ways, though their cohesiveness generally remains strong throughout the episode (up to sharing one house without divvying up private bedrooms. It's a Walking Dead Sleepover!)

We start the episode with Rick and Deanna, the leader of the Alexandria Safe-Zone. Deanna is a former Congresswoman, which immediately makes us suspicious of her and her motives. Power is often established by titles, lest we remember what happened with The Governor. And they have a pretty cushy setup that hasn't been ravaged by marauders or zombies, which is kind of amazing given everything Rick and his group has been through. Two years without any major dust-ups, even though neighboring communities have been torched and run over? Seems suspect, given what we've seen of them so far. Rick even says at the beginning, after Sasha handily blows the head off of a walker heading towards the gate, "It's a good thing we're here." He doesn't trust their ability to keep them safe from the moment he walks in the door. Deanna reiterates that their inclusion to the new community is both deliberate and rare. Rick tells her point-blank they shouldn't be letting anyone through the gates, because it's all about survival now. He tells her that he's done some awful things to protect his family and himself. Methinks that's her only warning of what's to come if they fail to keep Rick's group safe.

Note that he doesn't ask her the three questions, which leads me to believe that he does see how inept/naive they are. He practically transcribed what they could expect from their group - which, at the very least, would re-establish leadership and power. Everyone has an agenda, using others to survive. This line is repeated twice in the episode, which sounds like a warning against outsiders in general... but keep in mind those in Rick's group are the outsiders now. (Her question of whether he was warning her about his group or already looking after hers went unanswered. With Rick, it's always been more about what he *doesn't* say.) Almost immediately he accepts the hospitality, even gets cleaned up in a titillating shower/shave scene that was long overdue. God, I hated that beard. I'm not a fan of beards overall, but Rick was a few months out from joining ZZ Top. This established the primal, throat-chewing Rick, so much so I kind of forgot what kind of hottie was living under there. In a show that routinely has me peeking out behind finger shields, it was nice to have something pleasant to look at for a change. (More of that, please.)

Sadly, we didn't get a naked-in-the-shower scene with Daryl, who refuses to acclimate into this new community as easily as his fearless leader. From the moment he kills a possum on the way into the Alexandria Safe-Zone ("Brought dinner,") we're shown - repeatedly - that Daryl refuses to compromise the person he's become in the wake of the zombie apocalypse. He's there for the others, not himself. "The boy and the baby, they deserve a roof. I guess."

To be fair, Daryl wouldn't easily acclimate into this kind of Mayberry scene prior to the world falling apart. This reestablishes him as an outsider who doesn't fit in, where his behavior stands out against the "normal" setting. He's smart and quick-witted, so the audience buys the tension he's selling - that this place is too good to be true.

Michonne, however, wants to believe that this is a place they can stay and even thrive, which is a stark difference from how she felt about Woodbury upon first arriving. She didn't like the Governor, she didn't trust the facade of security and normalcy - she was a lot like Daryl upon entering the Alexandria Safe-Zone. Now the long-suffering Samurai just wants to believe, to hope... something she once ridiculed in Andrea, who so quickly drank the Woodbury Kool-Aid.

So what has changed? The most glaring difference is that she's not the same person who arrived at the prison in Season 3. She's opened up to Rick and his group, adopting them as family. This was why she opted to find them after the prison burned. She *couldn't* go back to the person she was. Rick and particularly Carl knocked down her formidable walls one by one. One gets the feeling that there's an extremely protective mother figure under all that badassery. With Judith and Carl to protect, she knows they can't stay on the road. But, as we learned from the last episode, her desire to find shelter and safety doesn't override her keen sense of self-preservation. When she asked Aaron the three questions, we knew our katana-wielding Michonne might desire safety, but she's not willing to sacrifice her common sense for it. (Unlike Andrea.)

Also unlike Andrea, Carol is playing a master strategist in this new community. She's come a lot way from the mousy little victim she was in Season 1. Everyone has an agenda, or so Rick says, and Carol was playing a part from the moment she took off her gun. We knew what she was doing the minute she talked so lovingly about Ed during her interview with Deanna. She played it off with such finesse no one in this clueless town would ever have an inkling that she can go Rambo at any minute and single-handedly wipe out a whole community. Unlike Michonne, who carries her sword like an appendage, Carol can still camouflage herself and fly stealth, which appears to be exactly what she's doing by involving herself with the community.

She encourages Daryl to play a part as well, but he ain't having it. I, for one, hope she makes good on her threat to hose him down. (I love you, Daryl. Please take a shower.)

Carl, who has spent the last few years of his young life on the road in survival mode, doesn't know quite what to do now that he's surrounded by kids his own age, who are allowed to be kids their own age. They talk about things like school and video games and Carl is completely out of his element.

Carl later tells his father that these people are weak and he doesn't want their group to become weak too. They get to flex their muscle when they head over the gate, Rick to fetch his hidden gun (which is gone,) and Carl to chase after Enid, another teen "from the outside," who disappeared beyond the gate for reasons yet unknown. Instead of being angry with Carl for leaving the fortress of their new home, he accepts his presence outside the gate silently as they take on some errant "roamers."

There's nothing like father-son bonding when you get to ram a steel rod through the heads of zombies.

One of conditions of living in the Alexandria Safe-Zone is that each of them gets to have a "job." The Good Congresswoman holds off assigning tasks for Rick, Michonne and "Mr. Dixon." Glenn, Tara and (oddly) Noah are selected to go on a run with her son, Aiden, and his buddy, gate-keeper Nick. Aiden's a Talker from the get-go. He brags about his ROTC qualifications, calling their weapons 'sweet biscuits.' Fairly soon into their journey beyond the walls, we figure out that Aiden is completely full of shit, totally inept in doing the very thing Glenn has been doing from Season 1, Episode 1. And Glenn is rightly bothered by it, especially when it nearly costs Tara her life. (*Finger Shields Alert: Under Your Skin Walker.) Aiden tries to squash the rebellion immediately, but the timid little pizza delivery guy is long gone when Glenn (rightly) lays Aiden on his ass for being an arrogant jackhole.

Things very briefly turn to shit when Daryl tackles Nick during the scuffle that ensues. Rick has to contain the angry Archer, who paces like a caged tiger before finally stalking off in disgust after Deanna, who sides with the outsiders and with Glenn (and even thanks him for punching her son,) assigns Rick and Michonne to be the law in their humble little community. Both readily accept.

(Remember what I said earlier about titles establishing power? That's *Constable* Friendly now.)

I have to admit I had forgotten how much I missed Sheriff Rick until he walked out in that uniform. He's not the same man that he was before, not by a long shot. And we know this by the end of the episode, despite all the physical changes. He tells both Carol and Daryl that he's "trying it on for size," (i.e. playing the game.) He also lets both of them know that the weakness of the community doesn't bother him. His group is too strong to be weakened... and if it comes down to it, they'll take the Alexandria Safe-Zone as their own.

(Shiver.)

Like our group, I think we viewers are road-weary. We need a place to stop and catch our breath, and the Alexandria Safe-Zone seems as good a place as any. (For now at least, we all know how these things never last.) My biggest concern, obviously, is Daryl. Deanna already told Rick she had to exile three men, which she considered a "death sentence." Rick and his gang already proved that those who are willing to do anything to survive generally do, so that isn't necessarily true. If Daryl resists assimilating, which could be seen as posing a threat to her community, Deanna could exile Daryl as a result, which would remove him from the canvas without necessarily killing him, though everyone might assume he was good as dead.

(No one said, "If Daryl disappears, we riot!" Loopholes, people. Loopholes.)

But even if he was able to blend in at this point, if that were part of some bigger plan, like what Carol is doing, the question is could he? Even in Season 2, when they had the sanctuary of the farm, he opted to stay off to himself. He needed a purpose to earn his place in that group after Merle disappeared. Back then it was locating Sophia. After the prison fell, it was protecting Beth. What is Daryl Dixon's purpose now, particularly when Michonne has replaced him as Rick's right hand in the new group? It's entirely possible that he doesn't even know, which will make the coming episodes a challenge for him. He's subtly being distanced from the group, which worries me going forward.

For now, at least, our group made it through another episode without a major loss. At this point in the game, that may be the biggest win. With only four more episodes to go until the season finale, my hopes are not high that it will last.

Two questions going further:

1. Ron told Carl that Enid was from the outside, too. Deanna had already told Rick that they hadn't let anyone else from the outside in for a long while. How long has young Enid been a part of the Alexandria Safe-Zone? And where does she go when she hops the gate and roams on the other side of the safe walls?

2. There are all sorts of warning bells regarding Jessie's husband, who didn't seem all that welcoming when he talked to Rick during his late night walk. Jessie never mentioned a husband during her little visit to Rick, where she offered to go into a half-naked stranger's house to "cut his hair." That, and Mike's "overly strict" father mentioned by the kids, as well as Aiden's overinflated ego/superiority complex, hints to discord already running through the community. Is that why Deanna was so eager to invite their group inside the walls, and virtually hand power over to Rick?

Guess we'll have to wait till next week's episode, the ominously titled "Forget," to find out.